Crime & Safety

Dumbest Place Ever to Park a Stolen Car?

Also, a Collingswood teen walks away after being hit by a car and a corrections officer allegedly poses as a cop to coerce free sex from prostitutes in this week's weird crime news from around the region.

Each week, Patch combs through the more shocking, surprising and often absurd alleged criminal acts and police-related incidents that unfold around the region. Here’s what went on last week for “OMG PD.”

Hit-and-run victim keeps on running: 13-year-old Owen Knauss left his mom an 11-word voicemail she’ll never forget: "" The Collingswood teen was crossing Haddon Avenue when he was smacked by a Ford Mustang, but brushed himself off after the accident, kept on going to an afterschool program, and wasn’t seriously hurt. The car didn’t fare as well, with a busted windshield and broken-off driver’s-side mirror.

Partying a bit too hard on St. Paddy’s Day: Mount Laurel Police charged five drivers with driving while intoxicated in less than 24 hours, including a 16-year-old. A word to the wise: We put out local cab info ahead of the big party weekends for a reason.

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You parked it where? There might be dumber places to hang out in a stolen car than in the public lot of a police station—yes, Cherry Hill Police said that really happened—but none of us here at Patch have come up with anything.

A place reserved in the special hell: This is about as low as it gets: Haddonfield Police say a thief allegedly grabbed a handful of gift cards from a woman’s purse as she taught Sunday school at Haddonfield First Presbyterian Church.

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Maybe they’re going through a denim shortage: In one of the weirder shoplifting reports out of the Cherry Hill Mall, two women went into JCPenney and, with an entire department store to choose from, allegedly stole hundreds of dollars worth of jeans.

The fake blue line: Posing as a cop is never a good idea, but it’s even worse if you’re doing it to get out of paying hookers, as the state Attorney General’s office says a corrections officer from Burlington City was doing in Maple Shade. Juan R. Stevens would phone up prostitutes, meet them at hotels, then flash a badge and coerce the women into free sex, the AG’s office alleges.

Check out those contractors ahead of time: A roofer from Cherry Hill got charged for the second time this year after failing to make good on promised repairs, Mount Laurel Police said. Huge surprise, the roofer’s Better Business Bureau rating is in the toilet.

Would-be shoplifters beware: Collingswood Police don’t give up—more than three months after an unidentified woman allegedly grabbed several boxes of laxatives and other products from Rite Aid, they tracked down Westmont’s Aleisha Schaefer and charged her in the incident.


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